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Fear and the blanket of awareness

I was cautious about sending out my Friday message of love leading with the concept of fear, but fear is a powerful emotion that leads to awareness! Avoiding it is precisely what feeds and enables it to rule our lives internally and externally. It is collectively contagious and hijacks our psyche faster than any other emotion. An older survey showed that the fear of public speaking ranks first amongst most people, with the second on the list being death, as a famous comedian put it “People prefer to be in the casket than give the eulogy”.

Fear of failure and fear of missing out are two strong undercurrents that take control of our limbic system, putting us in a trance of worrying. It doesn’t matter if we are worried about being good parents, brothers, daughters, partners, employees, or consultants; the human mind slips into darkness and starts playing a horror movie about falling short, over and over again, until it sends enough harmful messages to our body to cause a physical reaction.

Fear is primal and directly related to survival; as such, it has the superpower to disconnect our more evolved parts of the brain. In short, has an Executive order to control us on a path of self-destruction. We can’t pretend it is not there, nor should we continue to suppress it. The latter leads to depression, outbursts, addictions to substances and behaviour, anything from food to shopping, alcohol, approval, and power.

The way out is a blanket of awareness.

Fear makes us believe we are drowning in a river of large boulders, unable to change our circumstances. In reality, every situation that triggers fear is an opportunity to grow, to expand and have an adventure. 

When we practice awareness and gently explore where fear feels in our bodies, what is it that it truly wants us to see and feel? When we learn to sit with it, one moment at a time, we surround fear with a blanket of awareness. We nurture it and disconnect its power from our limbic system. This is the path to overcoming challenging situations, having breakthroughs, tapping into our creative side.

Accepting life as is

When we are fearful and worried, we try to control so we are not surprised. If we experience trauma, we try to control life to avoid pain and hurt again. If we feel we are going to fail, we try to control to save our reputation.

All of these survival mechanisms have helped in the past, and their role was to protect us at some point in life. But they are not sustainable or healthy when turned on all the time.

This is the tricky part.

Once we are aware of the secret plans of fear and how it operates, it sends another arrow our way- guilt and shame. They work together to send us back into the trance of being small and not enough. How could I do these things to myself? What is wrong with me, why am I unable to change and so on- quick and painful self-aversion. 

In reality, the awareness of the existence of fear in a challenging situation is already a victory for your freedom from the grasp of fear. Once we open the brain to a possibility, it starts rewiring and building new neuro connections. Accepting all of it, exactly the way it is, is the way to a more balanced, healthier and less stressful life. 

I trust this message will touch you in some way and support you in moments of challenge you may be facing. Most importantly, you are a part of a supportive community. Reaching out is brave and directly sends a message to fear you had enough.

Have a fabulous weekend, embracing your warrior superpowers.